LIVING WELL / MOTHERHOOD

november 27

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I hung out laundry today. I wore gloves, but I still put my laundry up. There was just a bit of sun and too much good breeze not to pass up the chance. I’m finding that I catch my breath in the comfort of these mundane tasks. And a breath is what I really need today–home from traveling for the holiday, everyone recovering from the stomach flu, elizabeth still mourning the entrance of three teeth.

And I’ve been thinking a lot about time lately. In one sense, time can complicate my life. In another, it can bring rhythm and order to my day. And more importantly I want my children to know that I always have enough time for them. To use a very tired saying, I want to be present in each moment with them. If I am getting them dressed–then that is what we are doing. I don’t want to be getting them dressed while tapping my toe at the other three tasks that are on my list next. If we’re putting away toys–we’re just putting away toys. No hurry. No multi-tasking. Just being. Just doing. Just keeping it simple.

Sometimes I face my day like I do cooking dinner. "Roast goes in the oven. While roast is cooking wash and chop vegetables. Start rice water boiling. While rice is boiling, heat oil in skillet. Sautee the vegetables. While vegetables soften in the skillet, set the table. Stir vegetables. Put lid on rice. Check roast. Unload dish drainer. Stir vegetables. Warm bread…." It’s a balancing act. And sometimes it’s quite an impressive dance I do to get everything perfectly timed and on the table warm and good.

It’s a good system. But a system is not what I need to raise my children well.

P1010024_3

I hung out laundry today. I wore gloves, but I still put my laundry up. There was just a bit of sun and too much good breeze not to pass up the chance. I’m finding that I catch my breath in the comfort of these mundane tasks. And a breath is what I really need today–home from traveling for the holiday, everyone recovering from the stomach flu, elizabeth still mourning the entrance of three teeth.

And I’ve been thinking a lot about time lately. In one sense, time can complicate my life. In another, it can bring rhythm and order to my day. And more importantly I want my children to know that I always have enough time for them. To use a very tired saying, I want to be present in each moment with them. If I am getting them dressed–then that is what we are doing. I don’t want to be getting them dressed while tapping my toe at the other three tasks that are on my list next. If we’re putting away toys–we’re just putting away toys. No hurry. No multi-tasking. Just being. Just doing. Just keeping it simple.

Sometimes I face my day like I do cooking dinner. "Roast goes in the oven. While roast is cooking wash and chop vegetables. Start rice water boiling. While rice is boiling, heat oil in skillet. Sautee the vegetables. While vegetables soften in the skillet, set the table. Stir vegetables. Put lid on rice. Check roast. Unload dish drainer. Stir vegetables. Warm bread…." It’s a balancing act. And sometimes it’s quite an impressive dance I do to get everything perfectly timed and on the table warm and good.

It’s a good system. But a system is not what I need to raise my children well.

22 comments on “november 27”

  1. I was sitting on the sofa knitting today and the kids were playing on the floor and I was thinking, “these are the moments.” They’ll be gone before I know it, I need to just breathe them in. Thanks for a great post.

  2. This is a lesson I need to learn by heart. I spend every moment thinking about what’s next. Today I will inhabit them and see how it goes.

  3. well said. why do we all feel the need to get through things without really being there, just to move on the next item on our list. thanks for the reminder. I hope to be there for my little ones too!

  4. I came to your blog to look at your sewing projects but found that I really needed to read your post today. Thank you for sharing!

  5. OK. Here’s the thing. From now on when i come here i’m going to bring a box of tissues to wipe my tears(!). We are admist another frenetic week here and your post has made me cry! You and me must have the same thoughts, because this morning I took a breath, took a breath and shut out the rest of the world to brush my daughters hair and tuck her vest into her pants before school! I made a concious decision as i walked into her room not to think about the lunch boxes or whether her brothers were naked, just one thing at a time.”If I am getting them dressed–then that is what we are doing”…absolutely. It’s a time and place thing i guess, in this house there are times when multi-tasking and multi-thinking are essential but I am so grateful for the comfort in living the little moments. xxx

  6. Ahh..it all comes back to that very delicate dance of balance. I too am a SERIOUS multi-tasker. I especially feel that pull on the one day Gabe is in daycare, which is today. I am slowly eating my breakfast now…while perusing blogs. Hmmm. =)

  7. I was just reading the back cover of “Buddhism for Mothers” and that is the message there, to live in the moment with your children. I so want to do that, and I will try to start today. I was tickled to read your post and see that you have the same thought. I really want my kids to enjoy all of the magic of the holiday season, and I want them to have beautiful memories, not memories of mom and dad stressed out and yelling because “everything” is not done. My husband suggested hiring a babysitter so we could decorate the house uninterrupted. Isn’t that supposed to be a family event, one the kids participate in?!

  8. Beautiful post. You know that this is my life lesson that I struggle with more than any other, and yet is so very important to me. I always need to be reminded. Thank you. xoxox

    PS: You won something over at my place!

  9. difficult indeed. simple and rewarding indeed.

    a daily struggle which is why i am now “home” with my 3. thank you for writing about it though.

  10. I was just laying in front of the fire, reading the final chapter of Sarah, Plain and Tall out loud (a book which I could read again and again), and found myself thinking, “It’s 9AM, I’m supposed to be getting dressed and doing something resembling school with the kids.” Then I realized, laying down on the rug with them, reading out loud, is what I should be doing. Not thinking about anything else than the wonderful book and how lucky I am to have such a leisurely morning with my little ones. I can get dressed later.

    P.S. You totally inspired me to hang my laundry on the line yesterday. It’s far from cold here (perhaps the high 60s) and I have gotten plain lazy about using the dryer. Thank you, as always, for being such an inspiration Molly.

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